I'm going to belt kick you in the nuts

Insanity fans-- It is with great pleasure that I share the following news.

Following my Insanity workout today, I decided it was time to learn a little bit more about the Cast I have worked out beside for the last 7 weeks. Upon googling "Insanity cast", I was elated to find that the third result was "Team Beachbody - LOVE Insanity - Hate Tonya!". Looks like Ben and Ben aren't the only ones with a strong opinion about Tonya.

Digging further, I confirmed that Tanya is smiling at the camera to try to build her brand: Turns out she's been in a wide range of workout and music videos and no doubt wants more gigs. More research is required, but I couldn't wait to share. Check out her website: www.taniaante.com

I'm smiling because I love it.

B-Spec

Halfway through Month 2

We're halfway through Month 2, so essentially 75% of the way through INSANITY.  My body has been wrecked every day since the start of it.

Equating it to running, as that's the only exercise I did before this, I think we just finished lap 3 of the mile.  That's the lap where you're tired, but not quite close enough to the end to have adrenaline carry you through.  In other words, it sucks.  Totally.  But now we're at the end of that lap, and it's all systems go to the finish.

I think that works nicely, because (hopefully) I'll get used enough to the workouts that I can really honker down these last 2 weeks and build some muscle.  I think I'm really starting to get some muscle definition, so that's extra motivating. 

I also hope to be closing in on Tanya.  As an important side note, Tanya is much less featured in this month (although still probably the most featured person) and I noticed a ring on her finger!  Sorry to the poor fool...

We do the final fit test before the end of the program fit test this weekend.  To be honest, I'm expecting my scores to go down due to extreme fatigue.  We'll see what happens.

Stay Classy,
B-Mil

I'm smiling because I love it

I can confirm everything b-mil has said about month 2: The sessions are longer, the circuits within the workouts are longer, and the actual exercises are absurd. I've come dangerously close to puking multiple times. Here are a few examples of moves that have popped into the rotation during month 2--- keep in mind that each of these is done for 45 seconds at a time, which is really another way of saying "until failure at 25 seconds".

Unreasonable move 1: The Balance Push-up. Get into push-up position, but with your elbows close to your sides (so that when you go down you elbows go back along your body rather than outwards to the sides). In this position, perform a push-up--- but, when you get near the top of the motion, lift your right leg and right arm up so they are parallel to the ground. (at this point you are now balancing at the top of the push-up position, but on only your left hand and left foot). Put your hand and foot down, drop, and perform another push-up, this time lifting your left hand and foot in unison. Repeat until vomit ensues.

Unreasonable move 2: Pukies-- Shaun T has a catchier name, but I can't recall it. Perform a standard pushup. However, push up so hard that you actually land on your feet with your hands touching your toes. Jump back down directly to push-up position. Repeat until vomit ensues.

Also, I want to give a big show of respect to B-Mil for admitting on the web that he missed his workout on Friday. Without his show of courage, I would not feel comfortable admitting that I too missed my workout on Friday. I have marginally respectable excuses, but at the end of the day, I skipped the workout when I reasonably could have done it. In any case, my 60-day Insanity program is now a slightly less intense 61-day program and includes a bonus rest day at around the 35-day mark. I feel a little guilty about missing the workout, and if for some crazy reason I don't come out of the program looking like an underwear model, we'll all know it was because I missed that one day. Oh well-- I won't let it happen again.

My much anticipated fit test 3 results are below. Nice improvements all around (except for Pushup Jacks, in which I mysteriously regressed).

I'm smiling because I love it. But seriously month 2 is terrible.

B-Spec out
(now imagine me doing a back spin and almost accidentally knocking out one of the other actors)

B-Spec Fit Tests	Test 1	Test 2	Test 3
Switch Kicks	45	58	62
Power Jacks	42	50	57
Power Knees	70	74	107
Power Jumps	30	40	48
Globe Jumps	6	8	8
Suicide Jumps	7	15	15
Push Up Jacks	22	26	25
Low Plank Oblique	14	23	27

Insane program, pretty sane effort

True confession blog followers--I skipped my workout yesterday.  A really long work day, coupled with responsibilities in my real life meant it was too late and I was too tired to put forth an insane effort.  You'll have to forgive me.

The second month is really challenging me in that the workouts are so much longer and more intense (so add an extra 30 minutes on to each workout where I'm just laying on the ground) that it's hard to fit in before work, and then I really don't feel like doing it after work.  I'll have to come up with a better game plan for the remaining 3 weeks.  How do you fit your workouts in, trusty blog followers?

Shaun T-isms

I didn't know how I'd feel about Shaun T initially.  As the type of guy that develops this type of workout, I figured he'd be a little too intense and too meatheady for me to like.  Turns out...I love this guy.  He's motivating, while not being annoying.  He says some hilarious stuff, paraphrased below.  I don't have the verbatim sayings, because I'm usually highly oxygen deprived when he's talking, but you'll get the general gist:

1. During opening stretching: "This is about to get super intense, super insane, and I'm smiling because I LOVE IT."

2. During the cool down stretch: "This profession--being a personal trainer--after days like today, I sometimes wonder 'Why do I do this?'  Because I wanna look gooooood!"  One of the other professionals turns to the camera on her and mouths "because he's crazy."

3. "Man.  Do I love killin' people."

These next three are funny, only because they're good instances of Shaun T using the 3rd person, which happens quite a bit:

4. "Whoo!  Shaun T is startin' to sweat and ya'll better be DRIPPIN'"

5. During a push-up exercise: "This is even too much for Shaun T.  I gotta rest.  And then you hit it right back again!"  (This is the only proof I have that he's not a machine)

6. During stretching: "Shaun T is getting nervous for this workout.  Anyone else nervous about what we're about to do here?"

7. While passed out on the floor: "That sh*t is bananas, yo!"  This is funny because they actually bleep it out.  It's taped--if you don't want it in there, you can just cut that clip.  If you want it in there, it's an adult workout DVD...you can just say the word.

Stay Classy,
B Mil

Fit Test 3

I did my workout last night at 9ish and then tried to do my workout this morning at 6:30 AM.  Two Insanity workouts in a 10 hour span was not a good idea.  I was pretty worthless during the workout and the soreness is out of control.

In good news, the program is working!  Below are results from Fit Test 3.

	Fit Test 1	Fit Test 2	Fit Test 3	Tanya
Switch Kicks	116	120	129	110
Power Jacks	48	56	59	65
Power Knees	77	84	110	125
Power Jumps	43	50	59	50
Globe Jumps	9	7	10	11
Suicide Jacks	14	19	19	23
Push-Up Jacks	21	27	31	32
Low Plank Obliques	46	55	76	70

You can see some definite improvement from 3 weeks ago.  The biggest difference was in Power Knees.  I had always fully extended my arms, but when watching the tape, I saw the professionals really only brought their hands back up towards their chin level.  The improved form (read: slacking) helped me get a lot more reps and close the gap on Tanya.

I included Tanya's scores up there, so you can see how I compare.  My biggest goal in the program is to crush her, and I think I'm getting much closer.  I'm encouraged after seeing how difficult Month 2 is that I'll be able to close the gap fully!

Stay Classy,

B-Mil



Month Two has begun and I am finished

Alright, I know it's been 3 weeks since my last post where I promised to post more frequently, but this time I'm in it for real.  Month 2 is just too insane to not blog about.

After 35 days of doing Insanity, I'm as sore today as I was after the first day.  I think it's safe to say that the only point of Month 1 is to put you in a position to survive Month 2--but that's no guarantee it'll happen.  Here are my quick thoughts (granted, after only 2 days in the second month) about the differences between Month 1 and Month 2:

1. The first month was very much focused on cardio. 
While my muscles would burn like crazy and I would often have to rest them (read: curl up and cry on the ground), the exercises themselves weren't impossible to do.  That is, I could at least wrap my head around them and do a few reps.  Most of the time when I'd need to rest, it was mostly because I was sucking wind so badly that I couldn't imagine getting into a push-up position.  I think that's what made the workouts seem "easy" by the end of the month.

Now, each exercise absolutely destroys me and my muscles go to failure, which happens after about 20 seconds.  Since I'm blogging so frequently from here on (no...really...) I'll save descriptions of particular exercises for future posts.  But trust me...they are hard.  And that is why I was waddling around the office today.

2. The workouts are a LOT longer. 

First of all, workouts are now around an hour.  Month 1 workouts were between 30 and 45.  That's a lot more time to get a little crazy.

Second of all, whereas workouts were broken out by 30 second exercises previously (each "set" would have between six and eight 30 second exercises), they are now 45 second intervals.  It doesn't sound like a significant change, but there's a big difference when you're jumping up and down or doing push-ups.  Yikes.

3. We have a bunch of new professionals doing the workout with us. 

I'm currently working on a post that highlights some of my favorites dudes and dudettes from the first month, but we have a whole new cast of characters.  My favorites are the girl who always works out in hats, the guy who for sure is a clone of Shaun T, and the psycho girl who doesn't shave her armpits to a satisfactory level.  She's one of my favorites because she is even more intense than Tanya, and anything that makes Tanya look worse is awesome.  I've caught Tanya looking over her shoulder to see what armpit chick is doing a couple of times.  Love it.

4.  We have new music.
The "intense" workout music during the dig deeper part of the workout in Month 1 was, as B Spec pointed out, very much like the Top Gun music.  It made you feel like you were working out with Goose and Maverick.  So far in Month 2, it makes me feel like I'm in a music video for a B-side Blink 182 song, which surprisingly is a compliment.  Thank you crazy guitar riff guy for your pop-punk rock motivation.



Expect posts about the 3rd Fit Test and my quest to destroy Tanya, what the "rest week" was like last week, a full breakdown of the professionals doing the workouts with us, and my favorite Shaun T-isms to follow soon!  Stay tuned and make sure you keep checking the blog.  It's starting to get CRAZY and I LOVE IT.  (Preview of a Shaun T-ism)

Stay Classy,
B-Mil